Judge me! Judge me quick!

Today while I was not walking to chapel, I heard someone blaring "Beat It" by Michael Jackson from their dorm room window.  It was great.  Okay.  I'm a fan of Michael Jackson.  In my defense, most of my favorite songs are the ones he sang before he turned into a white woman.  He fascinates me.  I'm for real.  He is/was SO STRANGE.  I am glued to the TV anytime he's on.  I love watching the documentaries and made for TV movies and about him and the Jackson 5.  And I was disappointed I couldn't watch some of his funeral since I was at camp.  And no, I am not one of those fans that was absolutely crushed and cried when he died.  I already told you how my brother and I made up about 2342349 dead MJ jokes.  I have just always found his life interesting... and his music such a fun time.  Judging me yet?  I don't blame you.  But just wait.  You ain't seen nothin yet!

"Thriller" may or may not be my ringtone... and has been since this time last year.  I'll bet most people think I put it as my ringtone because he died.  False.  He was alive and kickin' when his song became my ringtone.   His Number Ones album may or may not be one my favorite on-the-road soundtracks... Annnnnd... there's a movie coming out... about him... that I realllllly wanna see.






Isn't it ridiculous he's only been dead... for what?... 2 months?  And there's already a movie out?  I realize this is just a money making attraction.  I still want to go see it.  Any takers??

And for procrastination's sake...

One Letter at a Time...
A - Age: 22

B - Bed Size:  twin bed in this lovely little room I share with precious Hannah!

C - Chore you hate: washing dishes...

D - Dog's Name: no dog for me!  allergies.

E - Essential start your day item: i would say caffeine but i usually don't get any of that til lunchtime

F - Favorite Color: Red!

G - Gold or Silver or Platinum: Silver

H - Height: 5'8ish9ish

I - Instruments you play: none. buuut I've always wanted to play the piano.

J - Job Title: student currently...

K - Kid(s): none right now

L - Living Arrangements: Dorm: Hall-Roland Hall.  Room: 313.  Roommate: Precious Hannah.

M - Mom's Name: Ginger :)

N - Nickname(s): AP, Ash... and a few others, I'm sure.

O - Overnight hospital stay other than birth: I had quite a few in elementary school.  yay asthma.

P - Pet Peeve: can't think of one at the moment

Q - Quote from a Movie: "HEEEEY YOOOU GUUUUUYS!" -- The Goonies :)

R - Right or Left Handed: Right

S - Siblings: 1 younger brother.  Timothy Bryant!

T - Time you wake up: MW: 6:45ish.  TR: 8ish.  F: 7:45ish. (give or take a few snooze button hits)

U - Underwear: I see London!  I see France!

V - Vegetable you dislike: are beets a vegetable?  I dislike them.

W - Ways you run late: Getting up too late. 

X - X-rays you've had: several lung x-rays.

Y - Yummy food you make: yummy lasagna and yummy cupcakes

Z - Zoo Favorite: eh.

It's a "Come on Get Happy!" kind of day

Hello world, there's a song that we're singing!  Come on get happy! Y'all know what I'm talking about.  A special thanks to the Partridge family for providing today's soundtrack.  

After about 12 consecutive days of rain... it is sunny.  IT IS SUNNY!  And there isn't a cloud in sight.  Not only that, but there is a cool crisp breeze in the air bringing this already beautiful day to a level of ultimate perfection.  Even though I had to wake up at the crack of dawn to be surprised with a skills test in weight training class, even though I had a test in nutrition, and even though the power went out as I went to plug in my hair dryer therefore making me miss chapel... today is beautiful.  Today is gorgeous.  I love today.  And I love the Partridge family.  Sometimes I think I should have been born the era of bell bottoms, peace signs, and great music.

Have I mentioned that fall is my favorite season?  Fall is my favorite season!!  Ok, now you know. Today feels kinda fall-ish.  It reminds me of an amazing October evening I had with some amazing friends a few years ago.  All I will say is this... Me + Nicoll + Melanie + biggest pile of leaves I've ever seen = hours of amusement and pictures.  Enjoy!  Happy Fall!!!

The Not-So-Much Mule day

Last week Christine invited me to go home with her to KENTUCKY!  I've never been to Kentucky... atleast not to my knowledge... and this was such a fun time adventure!  

Her family works with a children's home and they have a fall festival every year to raise money.  So this past weekend, I went home with Christine and Amy to help with the fall festival.  When Christine asked me go, this is basically how the conversation went:

Christine:  My mom told me whoever I brought home with me would help me with the mule rides!!
Me:  Okay!  Mules rides?  So what exactly does that mean?  What will we be helping with?
Chrisitne:  I don't actually know.
Me:  OKAY!  I'll go!  I'm going to call this entire weekend Mule Day!
Christine: Okay!

So, the entire week leading up to Mule Day Weekend, I envisioned what Mule Day would look like.  I pictured a pole... with mules tied to it... walking around in circles... with saddles... for little kids to ride on.  I guess I got this idea from remembering what pony rides consisted of back in the day when I was a little kid pony rider.  Mules aren't ponies by the way.

We arrived at Mule Day (aka the fall festival) at about 9:30 which was the time the mules were supposed to arrive.  We sat under our blue tent labeled "mule rides" for a very long time.  I changed Mule Day to Missing Mule Day.   I think it was about an hour and a half later that the mules finally arrived.  It was then that my vision of Mule Day was completely and utterly crushed changed.  These mules were not mules at all.  They were horses!  And they were not saddled and ready to be attached to a pole.  They were attached to a carriage.  A carriage that held about 8 kids and would give them a ride around the block.  Pssh.   Missing Mule Day turned into Horse Day.  About 2.5 later Horse Day was obliterated when lady who owned the mule-horses said to Christine and me, "We don't need y'all!  We do this all the time."  Oh.  Okay.  Bye then, Missing-Mule-Horse-Day.  

Haha.  In truth, I wasn't crushed at all.  Since we had no real job to do, we just wandered around and people watched.  P.S.  I love people watching.  I crack myself up while observing the weird things people do.  I wonder if people I don't know watch me and laugh at dumb things I do.  I hope so.

I've recently discovered, while looking for a fun time picture to put on here, that mules can sometimes look a whole lot more like horses than I thought they did.   So, they may have actually been mules.  Who knows?  Let's be honest.  They probably were mules and I'm dumb for thinking they weren't.  But it's a better story if I continue to claim they were horses.

I have no earthly idea who this person is.  All I DO know is the caption said, "Tommy and the cool mule."  And that's enough for me.

There came a great mudslide... and the swine flew over the moon.

There are times in my life when I wish I had a camera attached to my forehead filming and taking pictures of everything I see... all day long. There are just some moments that pass by too quickly for me to whip out my camera and take a picture. This is fact.

Like yesterday-- I definitely needed a camera when we passed by a cute old man mowing the lawn in his safari hat with attached mosquito net. Or when our friend Drew was walking around in Wal-Mart wearing a baseball helmet.

Or today-- When I was walking to class and the side entrance of the student center was closed because of a mudslide. Remember that time Freed-Hardeman decided to tear down our old art building next to the student center? And they just left it a big pile of dirt? We had several weeks without a good rain but all the Noah weather the past few days changed this giant pile of dirt into a giant pile of mud... and then gravity ensued. The point is, I needed a camera to capture these men in yellow raincoats trying to fix the mudslide in the pouring rain this morning. Ok, so maybe this isn't exactly funny. It was amusing to me.  Although, it wouldn't have been nearly as amusing if they weren't wearing fisherman raincoats.

In other news, there have been confirmed cases of the swine flu around campus... one of them being right down the hall.  Yep.  Good then.  We've already talked about what great problem solvers Freed is.  We solve mudslides by hiring men in fishermen jackets to shovel mud... or something.   How are they trying to solve the swine problem??  By attaching automatic hand sanitizers on pretty much every wall on campus.  Yep.  Good then.

I'm going to PUMP YOU UP!

Sometimes I get on this website that posts people's hilar text messages.  Here is one I read yesterday that amused me greatly:

i hope kanye doesn't show up to patrick swayze's funeral. "i'll let you get back to your funeral in a minute...but michael jackson had the best death of the year. just sayinnn."


You know I laughed out loud when I read that.
I'm sure all 2 of you who read my blog have been anxiously anticipating an update because it's been an entire week since my last post.  I had a crazy-fun, long, exhausting weekend.  But have no fear, I am here to tell you alllll about it.


I mentioned in a previous post that my dad owns a powerlifting federation.  This past weekend was the 9th annual IBP (iron boy powerlifting) Bench Press Classic and IBP regional full-power meet.  So I travelled the distance (hah, she's going the distance! thanks, cake) to grand old North Carolina to help my family out with these competitions.  Twas a fun time.  I'm not going to bore you with all the details that go into one of these meets.  I think it is best described through pictures and videos.




This is our friend Chip at an Iron Boy in April. 



I didn't ask permission to use this video but hopefully he won't care.  Haha.  So yeah, I guess it's not everyday you run across someone who's family runs powerlifting meets for a fun time.  But here we are. :)  It's funny to watch people who've never seen a powerlifting meet before.  You'd think they were watching a freak show.  I guess it kind of is a freak show.  But it really is a big time sport that takes lots of work.  I'm amazed myself at how much these guys (or girls, in some cases) can lift sometimes.


Emily likes to call weekends like this the PUMP YOU UP FESTIVAL.  It's a true story.

Gatlinburg, TN. Forever.

Labor day weekend was most definitely more eventful this year than usual.  My family rented a cabin in Gatlinburg.  Was it amazing?  Yes, with the exception of crazy holiday traffic.  Let me tell you about that time we were going home and it took 2 hours to get from Gatlinburg to I-40.  Remember that time it’s only 23 miles from the G-burg to 40?  Hah.  But anyway, a fun time weekend it was.

I don’t know if you’ve ever been in the burg/forge (you know, like Pigeon Forge) before.  Eh, I’m sure most of you have.  It is like a tourist attraction city, basically.  About every 3 feet, there is a souvenir shop… usually with signs hung up everywhere…

T-SHIRTS 3 FOR $10!!!  You know the ones… the shirts that say something like ‘Smokey Mountains’ with a cat design or dolphins or something equally as random… made out of the fabric that shrinks about 2 sizes the first time you wash them.  AIRBRUSH SHIRTS AND TAGS!!!  SEEN ON TV ITEMS SOLD HERE!!!  And my personal favorite... FREE HERMIT CRAB!!! No joke. I don’t know where the surplus of crabs is coming from, but go team!  Of course, once you read the fine print (which is easy to do when you’re at a dead halt in bumper-to-bumper traffic) you will find you only receive a free hermit crab with the purchase of a cage.  Thanks, Gatlinburg. Thanks for building up my hopes and tearing them down immediately.

Whilst sitting in traffic, entertaining the idea of a teleportation device (I’m for real, I was making plans to build one and become famous one day), I decided I HAD to get an airbrush t-shirt.  Yep.  I’ve never gotten one before and I made up my mind this was the weekend to do most the cliché, touristy thing ever—to buy a personalized airbrushed t-shirt.  I even thought about buying a cage to get a free hermit crab… but decided against.

On the way out of town on Monday… we stopped at an airbrush shop.  Yessir, we did!  I decided that not only did I want a shirt, I wanted me and my cousins, Alyssa and Jordan, to get matching shirts—with all our names on it.  We stood around in this store, looking at designs, and finally agreed upon one.  On the sample design we chose, there was a lovely mountain scene, the year, and the words, 'Gatlinburg, TN.  Forever.'  Hahaha.  Forever?  Really?  I told him to omit the “forever” part, resisting the urge to leave it as is.  While watching him airbrush, I was mesmerized and wondered why I went to college when I could just paint awesome shirts for a living and make a killing.  The airbrusher man told us not to wash it for 7 days.  I told him I'd wear it for the next 7 days.

I chuckled to myself yesterday in art class when the teacher said, “You probably chose what to wear this morning based on what people will not criticize you for.”  Wrong, ol’ Barb (that’s what I call her for future reference).  False statement-- atleast it is for me.  So I may not be the most fashion-forward person in the first place, but I did it anyway.  I wore the airbrushed t-shirt to all classes yesterday without fear of criticism.  Yep, I wore the pink shirt… with the Great Smokies on it… with a sunset…. inside a giant ‘2009.’  Oh yeah.  That’s right.  I love it.  Jealous?  You should be.  Here are some pictures for your viewing pleasure:

Miss Jaunita, the lady who works in Lion’s Pride, asked if my name was Ashley Alyssa Jordan.  Dontcha think that’s a pretty name?  So do I.

I will probably write more about G-burg later. :)  kbye.

You want thingamabobs? I've got twenty.

I'm bored with the hero theme... today we will make a slight detour.

Warning: after I tell this story, you will judge me.  I'm just sayin'.

This past week, I've relived parts of my childhood.  I've watched 2 Disney animated movies.  That's right-- Aladin AND The Little Mermaid.  You know what I mean when I say ANIMATED, right?  I mean the classics, I mean the cartoon animations that made life wonderful as a five year old.  None of this 3D-looking, computer generated stuff.   I'm talkin Disney at it's best.  That's right.

The Little Mermaid is definitely at the top of my Disney movie list.  I'm telling you, when I watched it the other night, I was so excited and pretty amazed that I still knew most words to every song.  I'm a little kid... atleast I am when I watch Disney movies.

You know the part in The Little Mermaid when mean old Ursula (who I'm thinking about being for Halloween this year. hah!) makes the deal with Ariel?  When she says, "hey girl, I'll give you legs if you give me your voice and you have about 2.5 days to get Prince Eric to kiss you and if you don't you die..."  Or something like that.  So maybe so that was a paraphrase... but you know what I'm talking about.... right?  I know you do.  (P.S. Prince Eric is the most attractive disney prince.  Yes, he is.)  Anyway, so then Ursula is like, "Sing!! Sing into my shell necklace!"  And Ariel sings, "ah ahh ahh ah ah ahh ahh ah ah!!"  You know, that song?  That tune?  This leads me to the part of the story where you will judge me.

Back in the day, when I still went to our FHU cafeteria, Gano... [Here's a side note for those of you who don't know FHU-- Freed-Hardeman University... It's small, private, christian college I attend in the the middle of nowhere.  I love it.]  So yeah, at Gano.. back in the day... they used to have a cart holding all silverware about 254 feet from the food line.  Now the silverware is much closer.  Back in the cart days,  one would generally grab a fork and wait in line for food.  Do you also remember the parts of the movie where Ariel brushes her hair with a fork?  Hah.  I would stand in line, at Gano, with my fork... and it was all i could do NOT to begin brushing my hair with said fork and start singing aloud, "ah ahh ahh ah ah ahh ahh ah ah!!!!"  Yes, I wanted to.  No, I never did.  Don't you also love the fact the "ah ahh ah" song isn't even the song she sings while brushing her hair with a fork?  It doesn't matter, that was my Ariel song of choice.

That's all I have to say about that.  Going to Huntsville tonight and then traveling with the Grandma, uncles, aunt and cousins to Gatlinburg on Saturday to meet the Mom, Dad, Timbo, and other aunt, uncle and cousins.  We've rented a cabin or something.  I'm excited... even though we'll be driving for approximately forever and a day.