Day 3

Day 3:  My first love...

Hmmm.... this is going to be a difficult subject to write about.  Only because I can't exactly pinpoint my first love.  And does first love mean the first relationship I had where love was returned?  Or does it mean MY first love-- the person I first loved, even unrequited?  I'm not sure.

Even so, I often go back and forth in defining feelings I've had for boys in the past.  I suppose this is why I'm having such a hard time deciding who my first love is. After relationships I've always questioned myself.   Did I really love them?  Or did I just think I loved them?  Was I in love?  Or did I just love them as a best friend?

For as long as I can remember, I've been the girl that falls for the guy best friend.  And while I agree with Emily (that you should marry your best friend and most great relationships start with friendship), I often found myself in relationships that just weren't satisfying.  These guys were my best friends and we always had a blast, but most of the time it was missing that spark.

I had several crushes and one-week-relationships during the middle school years.  Was one of them my first love?  I dunno.  My first relationship or real-life boyfriend was in 9th grade with a boy named Alex... who remained one of my best friends throughout all our high school years.  I know, imagine that?

We had a dramatic 15-year-old break up and my heart was broken.  I suppose I'll give him my first love credit. :)

Day 2

Day 2: Meaning behind your blog name.

I'm sorry to say that this may not be so interesting.

The origin of "redshoes" goes back to sometime in high school.  My dad decided to make the family some email addresses.  In high school, I owned a pair of red Converse tennis shoes.  I also had a pair of black ones, gray ones, and blue ones.  The reds were my absolute favorite though.  I probably wore them the most.

Anywho-- the day Dad made my email address, I was wearing said shoes.  And thus the domain redshoes was born.  I was actually a pretty huge fan of it.  I love those shoes.  I love red.  And I also love the Wizard of Oz (I'm talking about the movie of course since the book is about silver shoes) where there are not only red shoes, but sparkly,  ruby RED shoes.  It's one of my all-time faves.

When I created my blogger account, I used redshoes again for lack of creativity.  And the 33 at the end isn't original either.  33 = March 3, the day of my birth.

So, there you have it!  redshoes33

Day 1

1.  This picture was taken out of sheer boredom while waiting for the boyfriend to come pick me up for a Mississippi adventure.

2.  I'm a preschool teacher.  I have feelings about this profession and working in childcare that I'm going to keep to myself.  Just know that I am one.

3.  I just started a fitblr called kbyefat.  Fitting, dontcha think?

4.  My boyfriend, James, seriously lights up my life.

5.  I like Girl Scout cookies entirely too much.  Tagalongs are #1 and Thin Mints bring it on in with a close second.  Those are 2 reasons I need to continue with kbyefat.  It's also a good thing these cookies make an appearance in my life for a limited time only-- once a year.

6.  I just realized I've taken up the most room so far talking about cookies.  COOKIES.  I do have a problem.

7.  I wish I had more time to sit around, look out the window, and paint.

8.  Even though I often feel trapped, I'm one of the most blessed people I know.

9.  I worked in clothing retail for 3 months this past holiday season.  It was one of the most mindless, boring things I've ever done.  I hate folding clothes now.  Especially sweaters.

10.  I'm thinking about trying to write some children's books.  Know any good illustrators?

11.  Hand written notes, cards, and letters are like treasures to me.   I keep them forever and it has always been one of the quickest ways to my heart.

12.  I can often be a Bitter Betty but I try my very best to laugh off any difficult situation that comes my way.

13.  I'm allergic to dogs and cats.... I don't like them.  And even if I happened to not be allergic, I still don't think I'd like them.

14.  My parents bought me a Wii for my birthday.  Once I figure out how to get it to show up on the TV, I'm sure I'll have a blast! ;)

15.  I have grand notions and can't stand it when one decides to burst my bubble.  Just let me be naive and dream, won'tcha?

30 Day Challenge

Alright, kiddos.  I'm trying this challenge thing... since we all know how great I am at updating and/or finding awesome things to blog about.  Cliche'?  Maybe.  Teener-Bopperish?  Of course.  Don't care.  Get ready for some greatness!


Day 1: Introduce, recent picture of yourself, 15 interesting facts
Day 2: Meaning behind your blog name
Day 3: Your first love
Day 4: Your parents
Day 5: A song to match your mood
Day 6: A picture of something that makes you happy
Day 7: Favorite movies
Day 8: A place you've traveled to
Day 9: A favorite picture of your best friend
Day 10: Something you're afraid of
Day 11: Favorite tv shows
Day 12: Something you don't leave the house without
Day 13: Goals
Day 14: A picture of you last year - how have you changed?
Day 15: Bible verse
Day 16: Dream house
Day 17: Something you're looking forward to
Day 18: Favorite Place to Eat
Day 19: Something you miss
Day 20: Nicknames
Day 21: Favorite Picture of yourself of ALL TIME Why?
Day 22: What's in your purse?
Day 23: Favorite Movie
Day 24: Something you've learned
Day 25: Put your iPod on shuffle, first 10 songs
Day 26: Your Dream Wedding
Day 27: Original Photo of the city you live in
Day 28: Something that stresses you out
Day 29: 3 Wishes
Day 30: a picture of yourself this day and 5 good things that happened since you started the challenge

Kbye, 2010.

Here's pictorial evidence I had somewhat of a life in 2010.  I did a post like this last year, too.

January was the month I took my very last class at Freed.  I spent two fun-filled weeks with Emily in the Priv House where we told each other ridiculous life stories, ate delicious cake, and discovered one of the most entertaining songs ever.

There aren't any pictures from February.  That was the month I begrudgingly moved back to NC.  

March brought about a 23rd birthday with more delicious cake and time spent with my family.  It was also month 2 of a never-ending job search and missing my love.  But hey, atleast there was cake!

In April, my love came to visit me.  He met my family for the first time and my brother commented, "It's like he's always been around.  I like him."  I like him, too.  :)  That visit brought MORE cake, koolaid, an afternoon of putt-putt, and a game of Cranium (in which our team lost miserably).  

In May I graduated.  Insane.  And then I moved back to Huntsville to try their job market.

June was mostly miserable with the exception of WAM time.  God has really blessed me with some awesome friends in this lifetime.  

In July, and we're talking at the very END of July, I was finally hired.  Yay job!  

August was a month of learning-- learning my childrens' personalities and learning how to best teach them.  An old friend of mine got married and this is really the only picture, while not with the bride, I have of that month.

In September we had our family Labor Day vacation in Gatlinburg... where we saw dinosaurs-- big boring dinosaurs.  'Twas fun.  However, September was also a month of sudden loss-- a loss of which I don't think I'll ever recover.

October... ahhh, what a good month.  The Sanderson sisters made an appearance in a certain haunted church building.  Unforgettable... let me tell you.  "...BoooOOOOooook!!!!"

November was Thanksgiving.  The weather was nice and we ate out on Grandma's brand new deck.  November was also the beginning of a second job.  Busy.  Busy busy busy.  So busy there are no pictures in my possession of November. 

December was also terribly busy.  I did manage to make it home to spend Christmas morning with my family.  It was a Christmas that quickly turned into a white Christmas, and a day-after-Christmas trek that landed me in a hotel room for the night.  Stupid slick roads.  

So, there you have it!  I actually did some fun things.  If anything you've learned I have a great love for cake.  

I spent New Year's Eve with my best friend sitting on the couch and watching the moon pie drop on TV at midnight.  I loved every minute of it.  With no one else would I have rather rang in the new year.  Year 2010, you sure did go in a hurry!

I'm not too sad to see 2010 go.  It wasn't a bad year overall.  2k10 gave me a lot of firsts and I expect 2k11 to be just as grand.  I think good things are ahead.  

Happy Ham Day

I've not blogged... in a really, really long time.  And don't let this post get your hopes up either.  This will probably be the last blog for a really, really long time as well.

I would say happy turkey day but I'm not a fan of turkey.  It's dry.... and just not that tasty.  I'd rather have ham.  So, happy ham day!  Ooooh, or dressing.  Happy dressing day?   Meh.  We'll just go with Happy Thanksgiving.  

As the holiday season has already come upon us (can you believe how this year has flown by?), I probably won't have a spare minute until after Christmas.  Let me tell you why!  Two days ago, I got a second job working in retail for the holidays.  I know, I know.  I've already questioned my sanity for making this decision about a million times already.  Who am I!??!?  I don't even know anymore.  The Ashley I know wouldn't be caught dead in a shopping mall on the busiest shopping day of the year.  Nope!  Not me!  Except for this one time I'm going to be working a 12 hour shift in a mall on Black Friday.  What have I done?  Hah, I think it will be good-- good money and good experience.  Let's hope so anyway.

It's Thanksgiving and I sure do have a ton to be thankful for.  This wasn't the Thanksgiving I thought I was going to have, but it has been good nonetheless.  Dad and Timbo came down and it's been nice to spend time with them.

You know what?  I'm thankful for my family.  I mean, really.  I've been blessed with 2 wonderful parents.  Parents who have not only taken great care of me my whole life, but have also given me great genes.  I know that sounds weird... but it's true.  I'm intelligent and pick up on things quite easily, I have a good memory, and I'm pretty cute.  :)   That's all because my parents are smart and awesome and gave me good genes.  My Momma is just precious and I don't know one person who doesn't like her.  I wish she could have come down here for Thanksgiving.  My Dad and I had a very good talk today.  He always has big plans, great ambitions and vision for the future.  He's already built one business that is successful and growing and always has more plans in the works.  I'm so thankful to have him to teach me to dream big and motivate me to do more.  I've got a pretty awesome little brother, too.  He's funny and is one of my favorite people to laugh with.

I'm also thankful for my James.  And for my job(s).  And for the joy, joy, joy, joy down in my heart.  And for juice.  And for jam.  And for jellybeans.  And for jars.  And for jump ropes.  Couldn't help myself-- had to keep going with the J theme.  And I must confess, I lied about being thankful for jellybeans.  They're gross.  I also could care less about jump ropes.  Of course, I might decide I like jump ropes after implementing the "12 Steps to a Skinny Ashley" program.  I'm not exactly sure what the 12 steps are quite yet.  But a skinny Ashley needs to happen in the year of our Lord 2011, whether it be 12 steps or 190709234 steps.  We'll see how that goes.

Bless your heart if you actually made it through all that random mess.  Eh, I just did a stream of consciousness blog.  Didn't you love it?  Isn't that J picture cute?  J is for jaguar.  Atleast that's what J means in my toddler classroom.

I hope everyone had a great Thanksgiving with those you love.  And if I don't blog again before then (let's not hold our breaths) I hope you all have a very Merry Christmas.  

Just Call Me Miss Ashley :)

A lot has happened since my last post!  The months of job searching finally ceased when I was offered a teaching position at a preschool.  Yes, I have my very first, real life, big-girl job.

I'm the lead teacher in the toddler room.  Yep.  1 1/2 to 2 1/2 year olds... approximately.  It's stressful.  It's wonderful.  It's a blessing to be employed.  And I really do enjoy teaching the tiny tots.  

It's weird to have my own classroom... especially since a few years ago I decided teaching small children wasn't for me.  Looks like God had something different in mind.  And so far I'm pretty glad.

Here is the big carpet where we have circle time.  The walls are pretty bare.  I plan on decorating.  Sometime.  Soon-ish.  

Here are the cubbies.  I basically forgot these ever existed.  I haven't had a cubby since age 6.  They're pretty handy though.  Notice the random objects on the very top of the cubbies-- this space is a catch-all for things I don't want the kids getting into.  If they can't reach it, it's not a problem any more.  Bah haha.

Here are my toddler-sized tables, toddler-sized chairs, and toddler-sized bookshelves.  When it's time to learn Bible stories, ABC's, numbers, shapes or colors, I tell the tiny tots to "line up on the purple wall" over there.  And after chasing a few strays and everyone is sitting on the floor, we sing about twinkling stars, hip-hip-hip-hippopotamuses, itsy-bitsy spiders, and Alexander alligators. 

 

Here are my sweet kiddos lined up on the purple wall "reading."  They are precious. Absolutely precious.

And on especially hectic days, naptime is such a nice break.  And look how adorable they are on their little cots!!

JINGLE BELL ROCK. Judge me. Don't care.

This is what sitting at home doing nothing on a Friday night looks like.  And sounds like, apparently.

I. Put your iTunes on shuffle. 
II. For each question, press the next button to get your answer. 

1. IF SOMEONE SAYS "IS THIS OKAY" YOU SAY? 
"I'll Be Seeing You"
2. WHAT WOULD BEST DESCRIBE YOUR PERSONALITY? 
"Boom Boom Boom" 

3. WHAT DO YOU LIKE IN A GUY/GIRL? 
"Great Indoors" 

4. HOW DO YOU FEEL TODAY? 
"It's Beginning to Get to Me" 

5. WHAT IS YOUR LIFE'S PURPOSE? 
"Can't Repeat" 

6. WHAT IS YOUR MOTTO? 
"Sleigh Ride" 

7. WHAT DO YOUR FRIENDS THINK OF YOU? 
"Maureen" 

8. WHAT DO YOU THINK OF YOUR PARENTS? 
"I Need Love" 

9. WHAT DO YOU THINK ABOUT VERY OFTEN? 
"Cure For The Itch" 

10. WHAT IS 2+2? 
"If I Die Tomorrow" 

11. WHAT DO YOU THINK OF YOUR BEST FRIEND? 
"Disciplined Breakdown" 

12. WHAT DO YOU THINK OF THE PERSON YOU LIKE? 
"I Wish (Skee-Lo)" 

16. WHAT DO YOUR PARENTS THINK OF YOU? 
"Believe" 

17. WHAT WILL YOU DANCE TO AT YOUR WEDDING? 
"Wishing Well" 

18. WHAT WILL THEY PLAY AT YOUR FUNERAL? 
"O Sacred Head" 

19. WHAT IS YOUR HOBBY/INTEREST? 
"Honey Please Can't Ya See" 

20. WHAT IS YOUR BIGGEST SECRET? 
"This Is It" 

21. WHAT DO YOU THINK OF YOUR FRIENDS? 
"I Dare You" 

22. WHAT'S THE WORST THING THAT COULD HAPPEN? 
"Two Cups of Coffee" 

23. HOW WILL YOU DIE? 
"Away From the Sun" 

24. DOES ANYONE LIKE YOU? 
"Hang em' High" 

25. IF YOU COULD GO BACK IN TIME, WHAT WOULD YOU CHANGE? 
"She Don't Know She's Beautiful" 

26. WHAT HURTS RIGHT NOW? 
"You've Lost That Lovin' Feelin'" 

27. WHAT WILL YOU POST THIS AS? 
"Jingle Bell Rock"

I'm not so Casper after all

I am so not a fan of long distance relationships.  It's really not the easiest thing in the world, and it's just plain hard to go for long periods of time not seeing your special someone.  Thankfully though, the bf is only a few hours away and we get to meet up in the oh-so-wonderful town of Columbia, TN every now and again.

Last night we met at Cracker Barrel, which is one of my favorite places.  And the food, of course, was delish.  Who doesn't like to eat there?  If you don't, I'm going to assume you're a Northern loser of life and cross you off my friends list.  Jay-kay, homie.  Don't get yo panties in a twist.  As we were leaving the restaurant, I spotted one of my all-time favorite candies-- Candy Apple Sugar Babies.  They're fantastic.   And also only sold seasonally and I've only ever seen them at Cracker Barrel.  It's a shame.  So, you know I bought some.  On second thought, I probably should have stocked up.  Oh, well.   You should try them sometime.

Aaaaaafter that, we went bowling.  I don't know if any of you reading this have ever met me and bowling.  If you have, you know how ridiculously awful I am at it.  I have no technique.  And no follow-through...  but I promise you it's because the balls I have to bowl with (on account of my fat fingers) are always too heavy.  So I can't bowl the ball with any decent amount of speed.  And I'm sure your average on-looker thinks I just drop the ball in hopes it will hit a few pins over.   Which is partially true-- let's be honest here.  The athletic gene skipped me.  I think I got one spare.  The whole time.

The bowling alley was surprisingly very nice.  It even told you how fast you bowled the ball.  James would usually register around a 19 or 20 mph.  I think I was usually a 7ish, 8ish, and 9ish mph if I was lucky. 

We played 3 games and each game, the background of our screen would change.  After the cool galaxy backdrop, we had a sunset, then a waterfall.  It was pretty cool.  And yeah, yeah.  I know what you're thinking.  "Girl can't even spell her own name!"  Yes, I can.  They only let me use 5 letters.  The E had to go.  Sorry, E, it's a tough break.

Unlike me, James can actually bowl.  The above picture is what it looks like to "follow through."  Maybe I should have been taking notes.  It was fun to watch him.  :)

Before taking this picture, I said, "I hate taking pictures with people who are tan because I don't like to see how Casper I am."  Don't worry, James gave me a hard time about that one, so you don't have to.  But really now, we all know that's how I talk.  And in my mind, "how Casper (the Friendly Ghost) I am" equals "how pale my skin is."  Makes perfect sense.  You know it does.   And it seems I'm not as Casper as I thought I was, anyway.

This begins our series of crazy pictures.

This one is probably my favorite.  Because I love that our facial expressions are accidently exactly the same.

Scary.  Just plain scary.

In summary:  We ate.  We bowled.  We laughed.  And what a great night it was.

WAM Time

About a week and a half ago, one of my good friends, Matt, came to Huntsville to visit for a few days.  It was fantastic.  We went on many adventures, mostly unplanned, and dubbed our time together as WAM (Wacky-Ashley-Matt) Time.  We drove aimlessly around town listening to the best mix CD's ever.  You should be jealous.  Here is a pictorial blog of some of the things we did.  Looking forward to some more adventures with him in a few weeks!

Does this Jesus remind you a kitchen utensil?

Homemade pizza!  Yum!

You can sorta kinda maybe almost see Huntsville... through those trees.

Matt hates this picture because of his facial expression.  I love this picture because of his facial expression.

Glad there's someone else out there who's skin is as radioactive white as mine.  

This picture would be our Album cover, if we ever became musical artists.  We decided.

What is love?

What is love?  If you're like me, when you hear those words, the first thing you want to do is bust out into song, "What is love?  Baby don't hurt me!"  And what an annoying song to be stuck in your head for the rest of the day!  You're welcome.  But don't thank me, thank the 90's.

Seriously though, what on earth is love?  Most of us know God's definition of love and are familiar with 1 Corinthians 13.  It's an exhaustive list on true, unconditional love.  Love's patient and kind... it certainly isn't jealous or boastful.  Love does not keep a record of wrong-doing.  The best thing about this list, about God's love, is the ending statement, "Love never fails."  Never?  Hmmph.  So love is something meant to last forever?

I know there are several different kinds of love.  I want to focus on romantic love namely.  Most weddings have the scripture about love incorporated.  This is because God wants marriages to be built on kindness and patience.   God wants married folks to keep on forgiving and not keep a record of wrongs.  God wants marriages to never fail.  It's a great design-- God's design for love and marriage.  Don'tcha think?

So, we have a an outline from God about what perfect love is...  but love is still hard to define and everyone seems to have a different opinion on what it means to love someone.  Is love just a feeling?  Is love a choice?  What about chemistry and attraction?  I've asked several people today what they believe love is.


"It's completely undefinable.  You just know it when you feel it, and that goes for any degree of love."

"Your question is like asking someone to define pizza.  So many different kinds, all with different definitions.  The greeks had it right by breaking it up into different words.  Love is holding the door open for someone.  Love is giving your spouse the window seat... Love costs.  If it doesn't, it's not love.  It's giving without concern for getting.  The higher the cost, the purer the love...  Love is the most expensive thing on this planet.  It must be, because people who don't feel it from those around them feel poor and miserable and lonely, even among the wealthiest."


"Devoted selflessness to another person.  It's self denial for the benefit of a specific person." 


"Love is a choice, that's why God gave it to us as a command.  We don't inherently love, and we definitely don't fall in love 'at first sight.'  We choose to love people despite flaws, differences, and insecurity.  We chose to love people on good days and bad.  And, when it comes to the person we'll marry, we choose to love them and honor and respect them for the rest of our lives.  We choose to break down all walls and let that person become one with us, so much so that it isn't loving another person, but a fulfillment of loving ourselves."


"To care about someone so deeply that nothing can change your view of them.  To see someone in their best and worse state and still want to spend the rest of your life with them by your side." 


"Love is a bond that is cultivated between two people.  Each person is willing to put the other first and self last.  While it begins with attraction and compatibility, love develops over time into a committed decision-- a special promise-- from one to the other every day.  As the two mature, their love grows into a closer picture of perfect love described in 1 Cor. 13.  Love is always the appropriate reaction to any situation." 


One time my grandma, who was married for nearly 50 years, was talking to me about her marriage.  She said, "It never crossed my mind that we would ever separate.  When you love someone it's all about doing whatever you can to make the other happy."  I take anything she says about love and marriage for gold because she and Pop had such a successful and happy life together.


There are so many things that I agree with from these statements.  Love is most definitely a choice.  Love is work.  Love is expensive.  Love is a feeling.  Love is selfless.  ...Love is a command.


One of my favorite definitions of love comes from Shakespear's Sonnet 116.  I had to recite when I was in 9th grade and have loved it ever since.  In college, I was delighted again when Dr. Cargile allowed us to recite a Shakespearian sonnet for extra credit.  I guess you know which one I chose. :)
Let me not to the marriage of true minds
Admit impediments. Love is not love
Which alters when it alteration finds,
Or bends with the remover to remove:
O no!  it is an ever-fixed mark
That looks on tempests and is never shaken;
It is the star to every wandering bark,
Whose worth's unknown, although his height be taken.
Love's not Time's fool, though rosy lips and cheeks
Within his bending sickle's compass come:
Love alters not with his brief hours and weeks,
But bears it out even to the edge of doom.
If this be error and upon me proved,
I never writ, nor no man ever loved.


So, everyone has their different opinion of what love is.  I guess that's another reason that makes it so unique and special.


I've always thought a lot about all this love business, for as long as I can remember.  However, I find myself thinking about it more and more lately.  I know that, for me, love is something I choose to do.  Love is something I find difficult sometimes and something that is quite expensive.  It's not monetarily expensive, but it does take a lot of selflessness and giving.  A lot of the time it means giving and not getting much, or anything, in return.  Love isn't all sacrifice though.  Love is play and laughter.  Love is time spent with those that mean the world to you.  Love is being absolutely crazy about someone.  Love is hugs and kisses.  And.. love is basking in the sun and knowing there's a person out there who loves you, too.