"SING!!! Sing into my necklace, you poor unfortunate soul!!"

Last night, I may have had purple skin... I may have dressed as an evil sea witch... and I may have tried to steal some voices.  Hint:  I did.

For 3 glorious hours, I was Ursula.  You can't tell by the pictures, but I was a very glittery Ursula.   Which also means that today I'm a very glittery Ashley.  Even after showering, I'm still finding glitter everywhere.  Cute, I know.

 

Ursula was not alone in her under-the-sea adventures.  Ariel was there, thingamabob in hand.  She wanted legs to walk to men's priv to see her Prince Eric/Bobby.  In exchange for legs, I took her voice.  Her fin magically began to unravel while traveling to the Priv House.  Don't tell me Ursula doesn't have real powers.  Who even needs King Triton?  I don't.

There was a mini Disney villain reunion last night as well.  Ursula got to spend time with her villain vixen BFF Cruella DeVille.  We made quite the puppy-catching-voice-stealing duo.  Check out those eye lashes. 

Ariel was NOT excited about the villain vixen reunion.

Remember that part in the movie when Ursula... I mean I... am fixin' to get married to Prince Eric and have Ariel's voice forever and take over the human world AND under the sea world?  BUT then all of a sudden Ariel's friends attack me and break my beautiful shell necklace?  And I get real REAL angry?  And turn into the giant sticking up out the water I'm gonna eat you and your ship Ursula?  Yeah.  That's what this picture is I feel like.  This is my precious pumpkin roommate Hannah.  She's tiny and I'm giant and angry and hungry for some ships apparently.

I told some people to sing into my shell necklace.  Some complied.  Others didn't.  However, I collected enough voices to last a good while.

I love Halloween.  It's one of my FAVORITE holidays ever.  I'm for real.  I love dressing up.  I love candy.  I love scary things.  I'm glad I get to celebrate Halloween for 3 straight days this year.  I'm headed to Nashville this weekend for more Halloween festivities and to visit some fun time people.  I can't wait!!!

My dear, sweet child. That's what I do. It's what I live for.  To help unfortunate merfolk like yourself-- poor souls with no one else to turn to. I admit that in the past I've been a nasty.  They weren't kidding when they called me, well, a witch.  But you'll find that nowadays I've mended all my ways. Repented, seen the light, and made a switch to this... And I fortunately know a little magic.  It's a talent that I always have possessed.

Farewell to all the poor unfortunate souls out there.  I must go now.

Random Thoughts of Today

Two days after Pumpkin Chicken Night (!) my pumpkin is drying out and withering.  Goodbye, beautiful Judy Garland.  Hello, Zombie-2-Face-Dorothy.  Good then.  I turned her pumpkin-demon self around to face the wall so I couldn't see her.  I'm not even going to provide a picture.  it. is. not. cute.  And no... I'm not bitter about it.  Not at all.

I'm starting project carve MJ one day this week.  You just wait.

Today, I went to Sonic for happy hour with Kristina and LB.  I couldn't decide which flavor slush I wanted... so I got a green apple slush because it matched my shirt.  It seemed logical at the time.

Speaking of my shirt-- it's green and has a giant peace sign on it.  Hippie much?  All I know is it was $2 er something when Steve and Barry's was going out of business.  I like it.  That's all that matters.

Did anyone see the moon last night?  It was HUGE!  And Halloweeny!  And YELLOW!  Gorgeous.  Absolutely gorgeous!  I spotted it while driving home from Nashville last night.  The sky was clear, a million stars were visible, and this moon was just spectacular.  God is the supreme artist.  My drive to Nashville yesterday afternoon was also gorgeous.  All the leaves are turning into brilliant reds, oranges, and yellows.  It definitely made Interstate 40 a little less mundane.  The sun was out, the trees were so pretty and the temperature outside was perfect.  I love fall.  Then, James took me to the Percy Warner Park to see even more beautiful fall trees.  'Twas a fantastic Sunday evening.

Those are all my ramblings for today.

Pumpkin-Chicken Night!!!!

Do not be confused by the title.  No, we did NOT eat some sort of weird foreign chicken pumpkin concoction.  However, we DID have a delicioso dinner cooked by Chef Batchaspaghetti-- baconcheesebbq chicken.  It was all real good.  We also had amazing pumpkin muffins by Chef May-May.  But that's not the only pumpkin fun we had Friday night.... we. carved. pumpkins.  Please contain your excitement.  Here are some instructions for a fun time pumpkin night.

Step 1:  Go to the Walmart House and buy beautiful $4 pumpkins.

Step 2:  Buy an over-priced pumpkin carving kit.

Step 3:  Place hair in pumpkin-carving-side-ponytail.  It's the only way to ensure peak carving performance.  It also helps if you wear an insanely stylish tie-dye t-shirt.

Step 4:  Cut the top off your pumpkin and clean out all the grody guts and seeds.

Step 5:  Make sure you have a diet coke handy.  Pumpkin carving is hard work and you will need to quinch that thirst.

Step 6:  Pick out a fun time template or think up a design to carve into your pumpkin.

Step 7: Attach and trace your template.  AKA punch out approximately 234098234 holes around the shape of your design.  Real fun, right?

Step 8:  After several hours of wonderful hole punching you can begin to carve, shave, and shade your pumpkin for several more hours.

Step 9:  When carving is complete, take a picture!!

Step 10:  Put a candle inside and share your pumpkin with the rest of the Halloween world!!

There you have it, folks!  Pumpkin Chicken Night was such a great success.  You should have one of your own.  There are several more pictures on my facebook you can look at if we're friends... and if we aren't friends... we should be!!!

Okbye!

Art Therapy

It all started today at lunch when Lauren decided to draw a portrait of all the roommates in Priv House 103W... including me and Katie since we basically live there, too.

Isn't it cute??  I'm the one with an A on my skirt.  I'm sure that was a "durrr" statement.  A is for Ashley.    And apparently I'm eating sushi.  I'm holding chopsticks.  I love it.  P.S.  Emily pointed out I'm the only one in this picture that isn't depicting a life skill.  Thanks.  See this blog to give suggestions on what I should do with my life.  Ahem.  Moving along.

I'm taking a class called Art for Children.  I like it on most days, but today I especially loved it because we got to paint with watercolors.  I know I've mentioned several times that I love to color.  It's soothing and calms me.  I also looove to paint.  When class let out I immediately went to Fred's and bought some watercolors and painty brushes.

And the creations began...

 LB is so cute.  I love the candy corn.

 We had waaaay too much fun tonight.

 This is my sunset.

 And this is my pumpkin.

Every child is an artist, the problem is how to remain an artist once he grows up. - Picasso

Whazzup my gnomie?

I had a pretty good weekend.  Went to Huntsville to visit Grandma, aaaaannnd Dad and Timbo Slice were in town, too.  We didn't do a whole lot but laze around the house, watch football, watch random lifetime movies, eat entirely too much... aaaand we went to Walmart this one time.

Me, Dad, Timmy and Jordan went to Walmart around lunchtime on Saturday.  This was a fun time.  Dad ordered a dozen corndogs from the deli. The lady didn't know what a dozen meant.  You know I laughed.  Bless her Walmart-Deli working heart.  Then when the corndogs were done cooking, she began putting them in the bag and lost count.  She had to dump out the bag and start again.  I probably shouldn't laugh at how dumb people are.  But I do.

Anyway, while waiting for the food to get done, Jordan and I looked at halloween costumes and such.  You know I've looked at this stuff about 9808234 times now but it doesn't matter because Halloween is my favorite. They have THE most precious infant and toddler costumes.  SOOOO precious.  My favorites are the gnome costume (pictured below) and this oh-so-cute pumpkin costume (I couldn't find a picture of that one.)

Adorable.  I know.  So I basically had a fit over these precious costumes when I showed them to Jordan. I told her I wanted a baby so I could dress it up in Halloween costumes.

Both Jordan and Timmy had really good school pictures taken this year.  They both gave me one and I told them to write a fun-time note on the back of it.  You know... something like HAGS (Have a great summer!) or BFF 4 Lyfe or KIT (Keep in touch!)

This is why I love love love my cousin and brother.  I'm just going to tell you what they wrote on the back of their pictures.

"It's fun time note time and I'm texting.  So now I'm taking time from my friends to talk to you.  It's the school year 2009-2010 and I'm 16.  We're watching Sorority Wars and we're at Grandma's.  So whenever you read this 20 years from now you'll remember the day.  By the way it's Oct. 17th.  So here's to you my lovely sister!  Cherish my face forever and I hope I'm not put in a drawer.

Your brother,

Timothy Payne"

Thanks Timmy.  Thanks for reassuring me you're my brother.  AND for writing your last name.  You know I'll forget those things one day.  I'm for real though.  That cracked me up.

"Ashley!  Here is the fun time note you asked me for.  Well... HAGL.  I hope you finally get out of college and get a job and get married so you can have a baby and put it in a pumpkin costume for Halloween.  :) Anyways we've had some good times and I hope there are many more!  ILY! 

Love Always,

Jordan"

Oh, Jordan.  Thanks for putting an emphasis on FINALLY graduating college.  And I'm glad she knows the correct order of events that are to happen before having a baby.  FYI, HAGL = Have a great life.  Love that.

Yes...  a good weekend, indeed.

Wanna play a game?

Remember that time last week was midterm week?  Sigh.  It wasn't very stressful as far as schoolwork and tests go... since I had none to speak of... BUT it was stressful because reality began to set in.  HALF OF MY LAST SEMESTER OF COLLEGE IS OVER!  Yeah.  I'm not being over-dramatic either, if that's what you're thinking.  This is... I don't even know what this is.  It's terrifying for one thing.  I do know that.

So, tonight, I decided to poll a bunch of my friends.  I asked, "What should Ashley do with her life?"

Here are some suggestions I received:

• Be a hustler (I'm a hustla, I'ma I'ma hustla, homie. If you aks, if ya if ya aks about me, I'm a hustla.)
• Become a professional pool player (I'm game.)
• Be a trophy wife
• Become a millionaire (Yes, please.  Gotta say this one is lookin' good.  Have I ever told y'all I want a red Hummer if I ever get rich??)
• Beer Wench (...great option, don'tcha think?  Can't let this college education go to waste!) 
• Live in Henderson and work at the Snook House (Snookum's is the best restaurant in Henderson... I really don't think they'd hire me though since I don't have any long jean skirts... and I cut my hair from time to time.)
• Move to Huntsville and be a counselor at Emily's sister's school
• Move to Huntsville  (so far this option has the most votes.)
• Move to Memphis and live at the MSOP house ...and not marry a creeper.  (I think I would have a one in a million chance of finding a non-creeper there.)
• Be a nun.  (Thanks, Benton.)
• Just graduate. (Gotta love those short-term goals)
• Move to Nashville.
• Janitor.  Be a janitor.  (Thank you, precious roommate.)
• A professional color-er.  (This might be my favorite one so far.)
• Live happily ever after.  (Duh, I will.)

Now it's time for YOU to play!!  What should I do with my life??  What a fun time game.  Ready?  Set! Go comment!

I'm bitter.

This isn't going to be a bright and sunshiny blog.  Real sorry.  You can turn around and not read, if you'd like.  Won't hurt my feelings.  I'm having a bitter day... I'm going to complain.  Alright.

Reason why I'm bitter:


1) I slept through my bible class this morning.  I'm real mad about that but also let me talk about this class for a moment.  The class is named Genesis-Exodus.  I've learned a lot...  But it's midterm week and we're on like Genesis 20 ...maybe.  There are 50 chapters in Genesis.  At this rate we will never ever make it to Exodus.  Am I bitter that I will not get to learn about Moses?  Yes.  I want to learn about Moses.  I want the felt board busted out and the story told with felt cut-outs.  Felty Moses.  Felty Jews.  Felty Pharoah.  Felty plagues.  Felty Red Sea.  Just like VBS.  I'm bitter.   ...and felty burning bush, please.

2)  I broke my glasses last night.  They're broken.  They're broken and I can't see far away things.  And I have to drive to Huntsville this afternoon.  I can't see the board in class.  I can't see who's on stage in chapel.  I can't see people's facial expressions from far away.  So, if you wave at me from 50 feet away and I don't acknowledge your presence, it's because I can't see you.  I can't see.  I'm bitter.

3) I have about 3-4 months to decide where I want to live and what I want to do with my life.  I need to stop talking about this before panic attack ensues.  I'm only 22 and I have to figure out what I want to do for the next phase in my life.  Half a semester left.  I'm bitter.

4) I want to eat something right now.  I want to eat breakfast every morning in my classes.  We aren't allowed to eat in class.  Sometimes teachers won't say anything if you do.  But most of the time they are rule enforcers.  What's the fun in that?  And why can't I eat breakfast in my elementary nutrition class?  She's always telling us how breakfast is the most important meal blah blah blah.  One day, the teacher went around the entire class and asked if we ate breakfast that morning.  I replied, "I'd rather sleep a little longer."  It's true.  Let me sleep and then let me eat my breakfast in class!!  It's a reasonable request.  I'm bitter.

5) akjdflkasjdfiweufknu4ijotgknrehirjknvfkldjvoiu toiewjdfu3ih4glr j;kljdsf8oiw;ejklrfmasmv oiweu2j3khnasdg...  I'm bitter.

Thank you.  Happy Friday.